Marking Our Calendar
Tonight we chose our son's birthdate.
We had a few different years and 365 days from which to choose. How in the world do you begin?
You see, our little guy (I am not yet posting his name online) needs a birth certificate for the adoption, and for that he needs a birthdate. An age of 5 was suggested by the orphanage director, but that seems too young for him, based on his appearance. After a conversation with our agency's country coordinator, we landed on a birth year of 2002. And then it was time to pick an actual birthday.
We sat as a family around the living room, and also - by phone - around our married daughter's living room. First we stared at each other in a bit of shock (we're doing what?), then we laughed happily, calculated carefully, and prayed specifically - and came up with D's spring birthday.
There is a harsh reality that accompanies this unusual request. It's because D is an orphan in an African nation, in a situation that offers him no future, that preserves for him a scanty past. We can give him tomorrow; we can't give him yesterday.
But because we don't know for certain the day he entered this world, that doesn't mean we can't celebrate his life. And so, on May 6, 2011, there will be another party, another cake, another time of gifts, another child to know the circle of family, the shelter of love, the security of belonging.
Looking forward to saying - Happy birthday, son!
We had a few different years and 365 days from which to choose. How in the world do you begin?
You see, our little guy (I am not yet posting his name online) needs a birth certificate for the adoption, and for that he needs a birthdate. An age of 5 was suggested by the orphanage director, but that seems too young for him, based on his appearance. After a conversation with our agency's country coordinator, we landed on a birth year of 2002. And then it was time to pick an actual birthday.
We sat as a family around the living room, and also - by phone - around our married daughter's living room. First we stared at each other in a bit of shock (we're doing what?), then we laughed happily, calculated carefully, and prayed specifically - and came up with D's spring birthday.
There is a harsh reality that accompanies this unusual request. It's because D is an orphan in an African nation, in a situation that offers him no future, that preserves for him a scanty past. We can give him tomorrow; we can't give him yesterday.
But because we don't know for certain the day he entered this world, that doesn't mean we can't celebrate his life. And so, on May 6, 2011, there will be another party, another cake, another time of gifts, another child to know the circle of family, the shelter of love, the security of belonging.
Looking forward to saying - Happy birthday, son!
posted by Donna-Jean Breckenridge at Tuesday, October 26, 2010
7 Comments:
Yay! What a wonderful day that will be!
So excited for you! Is that Mother's Day?
This year it will fall on the Friday of Mother's Day weekend :-) but it will never be Mother's Day, since MD is the second Sunday of the month (earliest it could be is this year, when it's the 8th of May). But as with three other dates in our home (January 13th, December 28th, and April 30th - our other three children's birthdays), it will be a special kind of Mother's Day!
A Spring birthday: a time of new beginnings. Sounds just about perfect :-). What a blessing you have and are; the kind that keeps on giving.
What a wonderful privilege. It must be so hard to wait to have him here with you. Are you able to have any contact with him?
No contact yet, Knitwit. In fact, he doesn't know about us yet at all. That will change in a month, though. Our agency's director for D's country will go there Nov. 30th or Dec. 1st - and our plan is for her to bring D a photo album from us.
So our next family activity will be making a photo album for him. Something else to add to Things You Don't Practice For When You're a Little Girl: putting together a photo album for your child so he knows who his parents and family are. We can send him a few small items, too, like a shirt to wear.
I'll blog about our album - I'm already thinking of ideas for what to do for it! It has to be small and lightweight, too, so our director can fit in 100 pounds of supplies for the orphanage.
And thank you Alicia (praying for your referral to come soon!) and Javamom. The blessing is all ours in this, I think!
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